I have spent the better part of my week in class for four hours a day speaking French. Learning from a native speaker who is aware of the challenges that English speakers of French encounter has been a godsend. Steve on the other hand, has spent his time investigating the gardens of nearby villages. Not one to let a language barrier stop his quest for peace and solitude in nature, he stopped in at the local office of tourism and picked up a brochure of the various gardens within a forty-five-minute radius.
One day after my morning classes we headed to Apremont -sur Allier to enjoy an afternoon in the Parc Floral d’Apremont. WoW! (emphasis on that second w, as the French would say it) From the moment we rounded the curve and the village came into view, I wanted to cry. It truly is the most beautiful place I have ever seen. Words and photos cannot do justice to this dance between man and nature. He provides the foundation for the pas de deux and she burgeons with roses, trumpet vines, hydrangea and star jasmine along the walls and doorways of the beautiful homes that line the picturesque streets. All of my senses were invited to participate in this well-choreographed ballet. Next came the adagio of nature as we entered the gardens created by Gilles de Brissac fifty years ago. We found a grassy area under a tree to sprawl out, so that we could connect with mother nature more fully.
And then it happened, a trigger from my past sent me back in time.
I did not traipse through my past alone for triggers rarely work that way. We use other people to mirror our fears to give ourselves the opportunity to experience them with hopes of finding a cure. So, for Steve it could have looked like I was creating drama, but we were actually both playing out old scenes from our pasts. We made our way to the Brasserie de Lavoir to break bread and the silence.
Why does this happen? Why, do our minds take us to dark places just when we are most at peace in our hearts? This question was foremost on Steve’s mind as he felt my reaction came out of nowhere. I tuned into my guidance to find the words that I felt he could hear as I shared my viewpoint. What I discovered is that I had defined a situation to mean one thing in particular without considering who was sitting across from me… my soul mate. Since we believe our value systems to be similar, and we both make our choices from a place integrity, we know we are on the same team and just like that, we were able to set the table for our emotional wounds to transform.
This is a phenomena that all of us know well. Life seems to be going really well and then out of blue, we get the wind knocked out us. Instead of seeing these situations as unnecessary drama, I invite you to do a deep-sea dive to explore them in an effort to understand what you believe.
When we are the most relaxed and the most vulnerable, our energy is wide open and connected to our heart space. It is actually the ideal time for something to emerge that was previously relegated to live in the dispirited places within us. We recreate the old energy at the precise moment we are equipped to release it. Our spirit team guides us to the places that will support this sea change.
From the moment we made land in Apremont, I felt powerful. I never knew such a place existed in reality and there I was in the middle of a Hallmark movie. This was the best place to revisit my past. The natural beauty of this village and all those that swoon in her presence, elevate her energy allowing it to support many broken hearts that are ready to mend. Because I trust my partner, I could open my mind to consider a new perspective. Should this energy attempt to test me again in the future, I will wield my sword of truth and slay the lies I tell myself. I will remember that I deserve to be happy, and I can feel safe knowing that I surround myself with people that are loyal and trustworthy.
The next time you find yourself surprised by your reaction, or someone else’s, remember that this is your creation. Your personal frequency has increased and the hurt you are holding onto is resonating at a much lower vibration. We get blindsided only when the contrast of where we are is vastly different from where we have been. It is not that we ignored the truth back then, but more likely that our vibration was so similar to theirs that we could not see past their façade. We may not have matched the intension of a perpetrator, but we matched how they felt about themselves: powerless and unworthy of love. We simply failed to take care of our own hearts. With each trip down memory lane, we have the opportunity to grow in self-love. As we do, we make the contrast between the two realities hard to miss and impossible to live.
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